I don't really know why. I just don't want to deal with the world, with people. I don't want to go outside, not even to my back porch. And so I've been stuck in here, leaving for maybe an hour or two max each day.
A few days ago the dams broke and I just started crying, tears that have barely stopped since.
I'm losing days and losing track and I don't know which way's up.
Seeing the GP next Friday. Dietician next week. I cancelled on her again yesterday, because really, what's the point?
I'm making her an apron for Christmas. There's only two appointments left until she goes away.
In other news, I've been talking to someone on Facebook for the last few weeks and, well, got asked out.
I don't even know where to start explaining why this is such a complicated issue.
I kind of want to tell him he's wasting his time because I don't go out much and am not in the place to cope with a relationship or any of that.
For those playing along at home, I've had a total of maybe six social encounters since I started blogging.
It's all such a confusing mess and I really don't know if I'm in the right place to be able to deal with any of it. I'm going to try to get my thoughts straight and will check in with how it went later in the week, but I just wanted to quickly check in as I know a few of you were worried.