Out with the Old, In with the New (Duloxetine)

This morning as I was waiting for the kettle to boil, I routinely took my morning meds without thinking, only questioning myself as to whether or not I needed something extra.

As I swallowed, a wave of panic washed through me. My pills are doled out for the week into separate cases for morning, noon, and night by my mother, so I don't think much about it. But this morning, I swallowed a blue pill - a new colour in my pharmaceutical rainbow.

I'd completely forgotten that I was starting a new antidepressant today, and I just swallowed it without so much as a Google. Those three weeks went by quickly. I couldn't even remember the name of it!

Find the box, and off to Dr. Google.

It's called Cymbalta, or Duloxetine. For once, the pharmacist didn't give me an information leaflet with the first packet of a new antidepressant, but I did end up finding a copy online.

Unlike most of the other antidepressants I've been trialled on in recent years, there weren't many big red flags. The side effects seem pretty usual; mostly things like nausea and dizziness and insomnia, which is nothing I don't deal with already.

My biggest hang-up would be that it's an SNRI. Not something I'd heard of before, but from what I gather, basically SSRIs (selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors) work on serotonin alone, hence the 'selective', and SNRIs are 'serotonin noradrenaline reuptake inhibitors' - noradrenaline being another neurotransmitter.

When I get a new antidepressant, one of the first things I look for is what class it is, because I refuse to take another SSRI.
Long story short, I was given Fluoxetine at age 12, it made me more suicidal and ended up with me in ICU after taking every pill in the house. It was years before I'd touch any type of antidepressant again.

So I'm not too sure what to think about an SNRI. Should I be put off, attracted, or not care either way? I just don't understand neurotransmitters and all that jargon enough to tell. I don't know if I should be concerned at all, or if my fear of SSRIs in general is even rational. Plenty of questions for the GP next week.

I did read somewhere that it's not a first line treatment, which is good. It makes me feel like I'm getting somewhere instead of just crossing off the next pill on the list.

And on the upside, as of today, I am officially off Gabapentin! One more useless antidepressant down, a pharmacy-full to go.


On Monday, I had the day home alone. And how did I choose to spend it?

I chose to stay on the couch, in my pyjamas, smoke inside and re-watch Inside Out, followed by 18 consecutive episodes of How I Met Your Mother.
I did absolutely nothing. I didn't stress. I didn't plan, or watch the clock. I just hibernated in the moment. I was warm and comfortable. I was calm.
My ideal day.

I stayed on the couch for eight hours straight, from 8:15am-4:15pm, only getting up to go to the toilet or refill my drink. Even Billy and Misty didn't get off their couch for the bulk of the day.
I know it sounds pathetic, but amidst the craziness, I miss relaxed days like that.


So, any thoughts or feedback on Duloxetine, or SNRIs in general?

Any experiences or input would be greatly appreciated, as always.
Apart from that, keep your fingers crossed for me that this isn't just another useless antidepressant.




xxBella