When I took the plunge and decided to start blogging, I'd just gotten out of my first real relationship of two years. It wasn't pretty, but it was a rare time that I've stood my ground. I slammed the door in his face, and told him to get the fuck out of my house. Mum was so proud of me. For bonus points, I haven't so much as checked his Facebook profile, let alone spoken to him, since.
Being so shut off from the world, I felt incredibly alone. I'd already lost contact with my real-life friends, and even socialising online was a huge rarity. Desperate for people to talk to, and seeing the opportunity, I created Too Much, Not Enough just one week post-breakup. The ex had never liked the idea of all this online ED stuff, anyway.
I started reading ED blogs about five years ago, when I was 17. I'd wanted to make my own for a while, but never had the courage to so much as comment on any blogs, let alone start my own. When I did start blogging, it wasn't an overly new thing to me. I've had various blogs since age 14, but this was the first blog revolving around Anorexia and my mental health in general. Some were personal, some were specifically about my sewing, or my writing, but none have lasted as long as this one.
I guess when I started this blog, I was looking for an outlet. Somewhere to share things that previously would never see past the pages of my diary. I wanted to be around people who really understand, and I desperately wanted friends.
Blogger is really the only social interaction I have, and I cherish it greatly. As you guys know, it's not often I see people in real-life outside of appointments, and even online contact is a struggle. But on here, I have daily social interaction, even if it's a no-words day and I just read. I have a support group. I've made friends who mean the world to me, and who I hope will be there for a lifetime. I've never before been part of such a welcoming group of warm, kind-hearted people.
As much as I'm not a daily poster, I'm always thinking or journalling or jotting down notes for things to write about, not to mention how much time I spend reading. I really don't know how I'd fill those hours if it weren't for blogging. It keeps me (somewhat) sane.
It was only a month or so after I started blogging that I made the decision to start seeing the dietician, which I don't know if I could've done if not for this community's support. I'd gone at least a year without any regular medical supervision. It took me another 8 months before I finally found a GP who wasn't a complete derpface when it came to mental health.
I can't believe it's been three years already.
I also wanted to use this as an opportunity to ask if there's any questions you guys want to ask me.
Anything you want to know about me?
Something you'd like me to post about?
Any details I've missed in the last few years?
I'm also going to try to knuckle down and get some more recipes posted, so shout out if I've posted something you'd like the recipe for.
xxBella
Congratulations dear Bella
ReplyDeleteOn three heart wrenching and heart warming years
I can't believe it's three years already
It seems like yesterday that we both started blogging
You are now part of my story
As I am part of yours
And I love that!
I'm so proud of you Bella
You are turning in to a beautiful young woman
Here's to many more years...... X
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
DeleteCongratulations :D
ReplyDeletethat's a big milestone, I'm glad that blogger has helped you so much.
I find it is the most welcoming and warm community I have had the pleasure to stumble upon and I'm so grateful for it.
You are a wonderful person inside and out, and love reading you so much.
I was wondering if you could post the recipe for the birthday cake you made o_o unless you already did that of course..
Take care my dear, I hope you are having a lovely day today
*big hugs*
Mandy xx
I never imagined this community would be so supportive when I started blogging. I probably wouldn't have even tried recovering if not for everyone here.
ReplyDeleteI haven't used a scale like that since I used to do bookkeeping for my friend's drug business. :/
Post pictures of your sewing!! I am truly horrendous at sewing, so I love seeing what other people can do.
Happy Birthday Blog! Here's to many more years blogging, sticking together on Blogger etc.
ReplyDeletexxxxx
p.s. Derpface hahaha that has to be the funniest word I've heard in a looong time. Derpface, I love it, I'm going to use it all the time now!!!!!
Jealous of those scales!!!!!!!! I miss you so much, I really want to get on a plane and flee to you, you feel like my sister even tho i havent met you, i love you and you mean so much to me xxx
ReplyDeleteLove you, Bella. I feel as though I know everything about you after following you so long, and I'll get to know the rest as you go, so no point asking questions.
ReplyDeleteI love you, chick. Keep writing, whenever the urge strikes, and know that you're the cornerstone of many, many blogs in the support circle. Godbless. :,)
I've really enjoyed your blog. You've posted so consistently, in good times and bad. I don't think I've ever thanked you, although I've been lurking since almost the beginning.
ReplyDeleteI have a hard time with change, and I cherish the things in my life that are always there. Your blog is one of them. Thank you.
Bella I do have a question!!
ReplyDeleteIt's super important.
Did you finish your pink walking dress with Polonaise???
Shelby
Shelby:
DeleteNot yet! I'm going to get back to it soon though.
xx