Friday, 4 January 2013

I saw my dietician yesterday afternoon, and my weight had dropped again this week.
I honestly don't know why she keeps seeing me.

I've told mum that I want to weigh myself at home soon, just once to see where I'm at, though I haven't mentioned it to my dietician yet. I don't have an appointment next week, but I'm back to my regular 8AM Tuesday appointments as of the 15th. I'm going to mention it to her then, and am planning to weigh on the 22nd before I see her, as well as a full set of measurements.

A little random, but I told my dietician how I weigh my clothes as to not effect the scales. All of the outfits I've worn to be weighed in for the last 7+ months, weigh within 10 grams of each other. I don't think she'd heard that one before!

I'm sorry I've been so absent. I keep trying to post, but I end up spending hours trying to write something, working myself into a frenzy and breaking down. I still feel manic, and I'm simply not functioning at all.

I'm feeling confident about my weight loss, though. I don't care if I lose 0.5kg or 5kg a month, I just want to be constantly shrinking.


My hand is edging further up my arm


  1. I worry for you so dear Bella

    Please try to stay safe and keep your strength up

    You are a darling pearl and I want you to around for a long time

    Love you x

  2. she keeps seeing you because you are struggling and shes worried, i imagine! i love u bella lovely boooooo, your arms are so dinky tiny small, id be so interested to know what ur bmi is right now if u find out and didnt mind sharing? or is that a bit perverse to ask?! i am so excited to get your letter :-) i know u struggle to write comments atm so im very grateful that u still find the power to write me something sweetheart. have you carried on eating between 5-600? love u xxxxx

    1. i think ur reward day is a great idea, stops the body and mind rebelling too much. when ive had a while on 1000-1100 a day and i edge down to 500-600, i still plan on having one or two 1100 days a week so i keep in check.but i think i wont rush myself given my tendancy to binge purge. i had a life without it once where i was pure restriction, so im teaching myself to get back to it again. love you bella, lots and lots and lots xxx

  3. Oh my, you're perfect-
    It's the first time I see your blog, so I hope you don't mind I ask you: Do you try to gain weight?
    You are so beautiful, but so skinny!
    Lots of love, your new follower :)

  4. You are breathtaking! I am definitely adding your wonderful blog to my reading list. We always see these perfect girls in the thinspo pics, but it's rare to come across one that actually exsists. Stay strong <3 You are my inspiration to make it through my fast Xo Sunshine