Things are finally calming down from my hospital admission. I don't feel as overwhelmed and scattered as I did when I first came home, and things are settling back into routine.
I saw my GP yesterday, for my fortnightly double appointment. Most of it was catching up about my hospital admission. She hadn't received 'the letter' from my physician yet, so mum and I filled her in. About Bronchiolitis, my tests and treatment, my medication regime, my smoking. I asked about lorazepam, and she gave me a script for "when I have panic attacks". The problem isn't so much panic attacks, as it is a disabling, constant anxiety. She wants to keep me on paroxetine though, which I'm not happy with. I've been on it for 3+ months, and it hasn't helped at all, so I want to start weaning off it.
She asked how the physician was, to which mum and I both said he was great. I have a follow up with him on Tuesday. I also told her about the funnier parts of my admission; like the 'stethoscope' iPhone recording, and "Where'd the tourniquet go?"
On my fourth day in hospital, by IV cannula needed to be replaced. The physician did it, so casually it was unbelievable. He sat next to me on my bed, picked up my arm, and tapped it from elbow to wrist. Then he swabbed the side of my wrist, told me to squeeze my hand into a fist a few times, and shoved a needle in. Tape, bandage, all done within 30 seconds.
He then looked around, confused ('innocently', as mum put it), and said "Where'd the tourniquet go?".
"It's still on the trolley." said the nurse
We all cracked up laughing. Apparently I was the only one who noticed he didn't put the tourniquet on my arm. I know I have good, prominent veins, but still. It didn't hurt, was placed properly, functioned normally, has little-to-no bruising, and was pretty damn impressive.
I know I really need to get my butt into gear with the whole actually quitting smoking thing. Just cutting back won't do anything for me, and I know it. In hospital the physician's parting words to mum and I included "nothing noxious" in my lungs, and "zero tolerance" on smoking. Everything I smoke will I only cause my airways to become more inflamed and obstructed. I've been smoking about a third of what I was, but I've still been chain smoking most of the day. I know that he'll know the moment he knocks on my back, or listens to my "waking bat cave" of a chest in four day's time.
My intake's bounced back to it's pre-hospital admission level of 800-1,000 calories. I've been eating around this much for months now, so that's fine. I still need to make a belated birthday/mother's day cake, as those days were spent in doctors' offices and hospital rooms. For now I'm being a couch potato, and relishing the time between appointments.