Monday, 17 June 2013

Distractions in needle & thread

I spent yesterday morning doing something I haven't done for years, but I woke up in the morning with a burning obsession. I sat in the lounge room, poring through my collection of clothing patterns, looking for something to sew myself.

I haven't sewn clothes for myself in years, since before I developed Anorexia, due to seemingly ever-changing sizes. But y'know what? I've been a size six, haven't gained significant weight, and have had fairly stable measurements for over 18 months now. I doubt I'm about to gain, and then lose again, 35kg within the next year. Or at least, I hope not. So what's stopping me?

If you haven't seen any of my sewing before, here's a link to my Facebook album (sorry there's not a more convenient format): 
Historical reproduction, corsetry, and costuming were my areas of speciality. I own at least a dozen books on the subjects, my favorites of which are published by V&A Museum. Sewing was my passion. Before my ED, my goal was to study theatrical costuming and historical reproduction, eventually at a University level, but Anorexia snatched that away, for now at least. 

None of my beautiful clothes fit me anymore, not by a long shot. They were made for the girl with measurements of 38-31-36, not 27-21-31. My sewing dummy won't even go down to my measurements. I've been living in Kmart clothes because they're the only shop who regularly stock a range of size 6s, but I'd like my nice wardrobe back (even if I don't go out to wear it). My personal fashion style has wasted away; now it's "whatever fits".

Sadly, few of the patterns I own go down to a size 6. The ones that do, I'm not too keen on, and I don't feel up to resizing a pattern. So I prowled around the Vogue Patterns catalogue, and found a couple of nice coats. Mum went out to pick up a pattern for me (V8346, pictured), and I've rummaged around for fabrics and trimmings (I literally have a studio room full of supplies and equipment, all of which have been gathering dust). I'm hoping I can do a little bit each day, and stay motivated to do so. That said, I've always been crazy obsessive when I get the urge to sew, or do most things really, and I'll work non-stop for days.

So, maybe expect the occasional sewing picture (and I do mean rarely)! I haven't sewn in over three years, so this is a big step for me. In which direction, I'm not too sure yet. Have I maybe found the elusive thing known as a 'distraction'...?

Fingers crossed it sticks.

Tomorrow morning I'm off to see the dietician. My intake's been between 400-800 calories for the past two weeks, and I still have no good reason for not going to either of my appointments last week. It'll be uncomfortable, to say the least. 



  1. You are so clever and creative Bella :) I hope you can find some enjoyment and distraction through sewing. I would love to see pics of your progress. Much love <3

  2. Bella I am bursting with pride for you! I'm completely blown away with how amazing your talents are! I can't wait to see your work progress and this coat is just splendid! What colour are you going to make it? Have you got anything for sale on Etsy now? I absolutely love your corsets more than words can say! And one of your aprons, but I went on Etsy and it wasn't there :(

    I hope you do find distraction with your sewing because I think this is really key in life!! Your strength shines on Bella!

    Much love xxxx

  3. That's so cool you know how to sew. I know how to crochet and am learning how to knit but I always wanted to learn how to sew. It seems so overwhelming!

  4. I'm soo happy you are getting back into sewing! I will be awaiting. pictures. Random note, the coat pattern you posted looks almost exactly like my winter coat, love it!

    Take care hunn.

  5. You are so good at sewing. I'm so happy for you that you are going to get back into it! x


  6. Every time I meet people the genuinely like to sew I think, you're crazy! (In the good way :P) I took it in 4H because my mom thought it was something practical I should know. It turns out I don't have the patience to really take the time or dedication it requires AND my things always came out shorter than planned. One of my friends does fashion design at my college and she made the most beautiful dress for her final project. If I could alter things I would go second hand store shopping more. I'm so so excited that you're getting back into this! When we were talking and you said you used to do that I was wondering why not get back into it? I hope and pray this is pushing you in the positive direction.
    Upward and forward. :D
    I love you dear!

  7. Yay, that sounds fantastic, hun, I'm so so so proud of you
    Much love xx

  8. (oh, and I added you on facebook, if that's ok, don't think I'm some creep :p I'm friends with Willow too)

  9. I am so delighted to read this Bella
    Getting back in to sewing will be so good for you
    Having a purpose and that feeling of accomplishment will do you the world of good
    Just take it easy and do what you can
    I can't wait to see the result

    Take good care of you x

  10. Hey how do you make your thighs and legs so skinny? Please teach me. Mine are huge and i hate them! I love yours :)

    Must you like starve and eat very little? Or what kind of exercises do you do to make them so skinny?

  11. You really are so evil. You like to cook and are so obsessed with feeding people. Just want to make others fat. You cook so many things for other people yet dont eat them. SO MENTALLY SICK and disgusting.

    You are so so skinny and really dont look nice at all! Go and get some more food in you lah! Its really you yourself that is making yourself so miserable by starving and restricting yourself. Why doesnt your parents put you in hospital to get well?!!! They must be mad for letting your ED win.

  12. Maybe someday you can get back to your passion. I have to say, that first black dress is very impressive.

  13. Yay! I'm so happy you are getting back into sweing! It's really great that you have something you like doing hun, I wish I could I could sew like you! It's really cool that you can make your own clothes :)
    I hope your week is going well <3
    Alice xx