Doctors, again.

My GP yesterday was utterly horrid. It's the last time I'm seeing her. I walked in and she just said 'So, what've you got to tell me?' Brilliant. She blathered about anxiety for a bit, then turned to my blood test results. Surprisingly, most of my levels are okay. My blood sugars came back well, Vitamic C and B-12 and Calcium and all that are good. My iron levels were a little low, actually. My dietician expressed concern a few weeks back because iron stores easily, and it's dangerous to self-supplement (I take Iron 100% RDI, plus bits in other supps). I also have a family history of hemochromatosis, which gets back to storing iron. Oops. I kept taking them, though, and it's all good. The range is really wide for iron, though, say 8-250, and I was like 12, so just barely normal. My bicarb levels were in big red letters but my GP didn't seem to mind. She forgot I was there to get my Implanon changed, and she even said to me "I'm not even going to do your blood pressure". Sure, I have a BP machine at home, but isn't that kinda important?! Ugh. I walked out, never to see her again. Also, she realized (while my mum & I were there) that my ED psych is actually a doctor. No fucking way, really?! She only wrote all my scripts and was my only physician for over 6 months... 'Wait, they have doctors for eating disorders now?!' She seriously doesn't think my 'eating issues' are a problem. Wut? BMI 13-14, and no problem. Bitch. Anyway, I asked my dietician about who would be a good doctor to see, and she said no one at my clinic *sad face* I've been there my whole life, with the same GP until last year. It's literally a block down the road from my house. Boo. So she's gonna look into GPs who aren't idiots about EDs and get back to me.

The dietician appointment was a tad stressful this week, mostly due to concern being expressed by my mum (and backed by my dietician) that I might just 'stop' at any moment. I hate it when appointments turn to the subject of my mortality. It makes me feel icky. But, yeah, there's a little concern for my medical stability. I think I'm doing okay. I certainly don't think I'm about to just 'stop' and suddenly die. Ya never know, though. Only time will tell. But, for now, at least I'm doing 'better' than I was a few months ago.

I'm still itching to lose weight. I want to do some metabolism 'repair', but I'm running out of time. November (and December, obviously) is the social season for me, and I feel pressure to lose weight before I go out with my friends (not to mention most gatherings are food-focal). Last year, I swore I would be 55kg by the start of November, for the first social event of the season. I ended up at the end of the month more like 43kg and in hospital. Yes, it's lose-12kg-in-a-month kinda pressure. Sucks. But I don't know if I'm even gonna bother getting out and being social this year. Still, I'd kinda like to lose 5kg if I do. Hmmph.

xxBella