I've been thinking lately about deception, and how looks can be deceiving. I've realized in the last few months, that getting all dressed up in a nice conservative outfit, putting on some makeup and flashing a smile, really hides what's going on. Whether its doctors, people on the street, or friends, I'm just getting positive feedback about my appearance, even though my BMI is still 13-14, and my measurements are as tiny as ever. I'm the same weight, but with better nutrition. My dietician clarified that it wasn't a weight comment when she said I was looking like I was doing much better, just that my skin/face/posture/whatever is better. My friend last night was lucky to avoid being slapped after he said I was looking 'healthy', but he doesn't know any better. I feel that if I pull on my mask & costume, I can make people believe that I'm doing well, when to be honest I'm holding onto my ED as much as ever, and I'm still slowly dying. But no one can see past my make up and clothes and smile, to see all that. I broke down to my mum the other day, and she said that she thought I was doing a lot better than I actually am, and linked it back to the fact I 'look' like I'm doing better (again, clarification that this wasn't a weight comment).
What do you guys think? Do you think that people can really be deceived so easily? I know that I spend all day in my dressing gown, freezing and feeling sick all the time, and barely have the energy to move, and that every day I wonder if it'll be the day I just 'stop'. But no one else knows that.